A Sequence of Horrific Events

[writerdanni]

Hi, I'm a noobie to this site, from Melbourne, Australia. "Weird Writing" you say? Well, thats my speciality. So I'm very excited to find you all here. Moving on, because I am bouncing on my seat here. A self-pimping thread I'm such a slut for these!

"A Sequence of Horrific Events" was written a while ago, but, is only new to being shared. This was my experiment in the tale telling style used by Quentin Tarantino in 'Four Rooms', 'Sin City' and to a lesser degree in 'Death Proof.' I love the disjointed and merging style that he uses, and wanted to give it a whirl basically.

It's short fiction, weighing in at only 800words. I would dearly love some feedback for this piece.

www.associatedcontent.com/article/822203/a_sequence_of_horrific_events.html

[ylarivera]

i like the writing alot. i'm a bit confused about the sequences. maybe you should put (*) between time jumps, because i'm not sure if it's linear or what. it starts in the end, and finishes at the beginning? i think (*) would make that clearer. but the story is good. kudos!

[writerdanni]

It was simultaneous events running in a linear fashion. The only displaced time set was the last two paragraphs with Carly getting on the bus. They were displaced, as this is what is intended to tie it all into one piece. It was intended to be a little confusing, the idea being to force the reader to think a little bit, involving them into the story that way. I'm glad I succeeded, sort of.
I'm afraid I have a set against the * in short fictions. In novelas yes, they are necessary. But, in shorts if i find myself really needing one, I have a tendancy to trash the piece into the recycle bin. I'm a * snub.